Today I had another of those dreaded CYFS (child, youth and family) FGC (family group conference) reviews. And I was feeling a bit nervous about it already, as it was arranged quite fast and suddenly.

It seems the Wellington family and ex-carers of my oldest daughter, who is the only child CYFS were still keeping a file open on, had been in contact with Nelson CYFS quite recently regarding my oldest girl. And 2 very lengthy emails were sent to the CYFS social worker. And these emails were very anti my daughter continuing to live with us and basically saying living with us is damaging to her mental health and that they do not support her living with us. And school have expressed concern about her unhappiness and anxiety to CYFS, yet never informed me of these concerns. Which I would think should be the first person they should be contacting.

My daughter only expressed unhappiness with living with us after she came back from holiday in Wellington. Which always tends to be a theme with her and then she settles down and everything is fine. And if I sense she is worried or upset, I encourage her to talk to me about it.

I feel her anxiety would not be so high if she had been getting some counselling while away from me and while being back with me. As I can only help so much as her Mum. But I am no therapist.

My oldest daughter is finally bonding really great with her little brother and it’s awesome! And my family feels complete and whole with her here. CYFS do not care one bit how removing her from my care will effect her little brother and sister. They don’t care that they are tearing a family unit apart. And they most certainly don’t care how it will tear me apart.

Basically removing her from my care says to me, I have failed her as a parent. And also that they do not acknowledge any positive changes and improvements in my parenting.

Right now I’m just feeling really drained. And I feel pretty fragile emotionally.

I’m quite tired, so I need to get some sleep.

Thank you for reading.

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