So I have 13 days left til my due date. But as this week goes on, the more I become very over being pregnant and I am often feeling very emotional. On a daily basis I am breaking down in the solitude of my room about it.

But today I am just finding it all too much. I am just so uncomfortable. My body is just so over this pregnancy and I can’t get comfortable no matter what I do today.

I honestly am wanting so desperately to go into labour today. Though I’m not going to do any of those labour inducing things. As I don’t want things to start prematurely. I want things to start naturally. The only thing I have done, which I heard can help, is walk down the stairs sideways.

I wrote about my feelings on a facebook due date group that I am in(that’s a group for women due the same month) and just couldn’t stop crying while writing the post and when people responded with compassion, that of course set me off and I cried even more.

I have pretty much been crying for the last 45 minutes.

I can tolerate so much generally and I think I have done quite well to stay strong and together for this long. But yeah, I have reached my limit now.

I am not liking that everything is irritating me lately due to feeling like this. I am not liking feeling irritated by my innocent toddler and supportive fiance. Though I am doing a good job of not taking my emotions out on them. As I don’t think it’s fair on them.

The Community Mental Health worker keeps telling me how she thinks I’m such a strong, capable and stable women. Well, I don’t feel like that much lately. And she never observes me when I’m not coping.

I am coping, at times, because that is my only choice. But it is bloody hard at times.

They want to discharge me from the Community Mental Health support. Which I’m not sure how I feel about. As I won’t have them to call upon if needed.

Anyway, that’s all from me. I need to try get through the next 3 hours til my fiance finishes work.

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